What do you call a person who drinks beer a lot? Alcohol abuser.

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Chuck Norris counted to infinity; by calculating the sum of a divergent series.

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Q:What do African American men call the Internet? A:The Internet

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what would Michael jakson do if he was alive? scream and hit the top of his coffin

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whats worse than failing your maths test? getting aids

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Vote this down and get DOXED

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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What did the chicken say to the black guy? Nothing, humans and chickens can not communicate.

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Why do cats have eyes? So they can see.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts

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Q) What is the difference between an elephant and a toaster? A) Do you seriously not know the difference between an elephant... and a toaster?

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John, Where are you John: Here! Where's here? John: nevermind

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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the best thing about an anti-joke is when the punch line doesn't hit you, you feel no pain

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Husband: Take the f out of way. Wife: There's no f in way! Husband: You just swore

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Hey Johnny what's after 2?? 3.

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What did the teacher say to the boy whose dog had just died? Haha, your dog just died.

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How many Jews fit in an oven? Nein

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Q: What did the dog say the cat? A: nothing, because dogs cannot speak, and even if they could, I highly doubt they would speak cat.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was John Elway.

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Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

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What do you call a man who is walking into walls and poles? A blind man who really needs your help.

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Yo momma's so black, when yo poppa rides her, he says "Look! I'm Hiccup!"

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roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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