what is white and sticky a stick from a birch tree

What's got two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

why did the panda and puppy get into a fight? how should i know, you tell me.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

The homeless man first experience warmth....in Hell

so an apple walks into a bar... I'm terrible at making jokes...

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Do you knpow why Michael Jackson is not dead? Dumbass, he IS dead...

Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

a black hispanic and asian man jump off a cliff they all die and their families morn their deaths

Why did the little boy have gum on his shoe? Because he stepped on it

You know what's sad and Funny? When a guy walks into a gay bar and doesn't get hit on.

What's long, hard and full of semen? An erect penis prior to ejaculation.

So a man walks into a bar. Well, he trips over it because it was very low to the ground and he didn't see it.

Oh no my baby is dead. Ha.

What's up? The sky. What's down? Your mom: she was stabbed

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

Why did the idiot take a selfie with his phone underwater? Because he's an idiot

What is full of water and drowning people A pool

don't read this

What do you get when you jump into the Red Sea? Wet.

What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

Why did the woman fall off her bike? She got hit by a car door

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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