What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

A plane is falling out of the sky, and there is a Priest, a little boy, Obama and a rock star. There are 4 parachutes and everyone jumps out safety.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby wearing a clown suit.

On a scale from 1-10, what is your favorite color of the alphabet?

What's red bubbly and spins around? A baby in a microwave

Two blonds walk into a bar, the brunette ducked

I was gonna tell a gay joke Butt fuck it.

What does it mean when you have big shoes? Either you were genetically born with big feet, or you are wearing sheos that are too big for you.

two tomatoes are running and one stops to tie its shoe and the other says "Catch up!" This begins to put the first tomato on the spot and he runs after the second tomato without finishing his shoe and he trips falls and dies of severe brain damage

What do two Jews have in common? They both practice the same religion.

A man walks into a bar He drinks the night away with his friends *Plot Twist* It was a dream He has no friends.

What do you get when you cross a dog and a school bus? A dog and a school bus are not sexually compatible and therefore they cannot reproduce.

A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

Whats black, white, and red all over? Hot sauce on a checkerboard.

How many ADHD kids does it take to change a light bulb? Let's go ride our bikes!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A vast quantity of things.

Q. What did Michael Jackson say to the banana? A. Nothing, he's dead.

I was reading a book about antigravity, but I put it down because it was boring.

Why did the Police Officer pull over the black man? The black man was not following the rules of the road and accepted the ticket with great remorse. The Officer then proceed to pull over a white man for this very same offence.

Your mumma is so fat that she wears large clothes.

A Black man walks into a bar. He then has a drink of Alcohol and walks home to return to his family.

What's worse than chicken pox? AIDs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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