A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walk briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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What do you call a chair in the middle of the road? A danger to drivers.

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You Wanna hear an anti joke? Womens rights

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Why doesn't the fat kid have any friends? Because he is fat.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I personally really do not know

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why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his head

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what did sandy say to mr krabs nothing squirles are not smart enough to make a air tank and go under water

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what do you call a white guy on a bus load of blacks guys? probably his name...

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Q:What happened when the black guy walked into the bar? A:He bought a drink and quietly drank it until he was finished.

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You know what likes to get fisted? Sock puppets.

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Did you here that Hellen Keller got hit by a bus? No. Neither did she.

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The Christian prayed every night to God for a new bike. He kept it up for a year. Finally, he got a bike for his birthday.

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How do you make someone think your wierd? Pretend to be a panda.

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A pilot walks into a bar just before his last flight of the day. "Give me a stiff one to get through this last flight, I've had a long day," the pilot tells the bartender. The bartender promptly refuses the pilot service and kicks him out of the bar, since operating an aircraft under the influences of alcohol would at least constitute gross negligence and at worst, murder.

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what do you call a boomerang that doesn't work? a stick

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Warning: Are you 16 and curious and stuff? DO NOT SNIFF YOUR SISTERS HEAVILY PERFUMED PANTIES! Because you know hormones, and then 18 years later she uses the same perfume and... Yeeah.. ITS HORMONES! DON'T PRETEND YOU NEVER SMELLED A PUSS... Well, nevermind guys, I believe you :)) PS: By DO NOT, I mean DO! I mean just make sure you dont get your mothers panties, your sister is gonna be like "Omg you are such a perv you and your dick always up my face!" Then you can go all like "yeeeaah you wish!" Moms panties? Seriously man, that is just sick! You need to get some self respect!

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I was at work today and whilst staring at my beautiful colleague I realised how hard it had got. So I quit

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Hey, how much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to drown as a result of climate change.

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What did the Johhny say to the black man when he saw him buying a watermelon? Nothing, Johnny is mute.

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I ran in to Hitler. "Hey, Hitler, what's up?" I asked. "Well, this time I am going to kill 6 million Jews and 2 clowns." "Two clowns?" I ask. "Why two clowns?" "See!" He exclaimed. "No one cares about the Jews!"

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What do apples and black men both have in common? They are both people except for the apple

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what did the woman say? 'duhhh, i don't have a penis durr durr' (By the way, I'm trying to be not misogynistic, please let me know if you find this misogynistic in any way)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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