There are 3 guys named:Poop, Shut up and Manners. They all were speeding down the street, they took a sharp turn and Poop fell out of the back. A cop pulled them over while Manners got out to go get Poop. The cop says, "whats your name." "Shut up." "No seriously whats your name." "Shut up" he says a little bit harsher. "Wheres your manners?" the cop says. "Back there picking up Poop."

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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whats the difference between a black guy and and an asian person... who cares kill them both

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Ha! You're so gay that I respect the sexuality you were born with and I feel completely comfortable with, and happy for, you and your preferences.

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What's as red as a Lobster? A Lobster

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What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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I love you, you love me. Barney is fat and not entertaining.

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rocky is staring at us from outside...

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "What will it be tonight?" He then promptly remembers he is on anti-joke.co but is too late to react. The horse has already shit on the floor. This is the fifth time this week that this has happened.

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It's about 3 days from Mother's Day. What do you get her? Nothing. Nothing is a very powerful thing. hehe thats what she said.

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Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

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I'm Stephen Hawking, and I'm a PC. I can't walk or talk, and I'm a Stephen Hawkings

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Exercise

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Statistically, 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.

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mom theres a naked old man outside my window and he stole dads ladder.

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Why did the basketball team from Detroit win the youth championship? Because they had a good coach amd dedicated, hard-working players.

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Well Nero, my actual name is Axel Knight, I might have used your "moralman" identity as my own social experiment of sorts, I mean no offense, and if you will leave some contact information, I am sure we can arrive to some kind of settlement... ...Keep your identity crisis thing, I have absolutely no reason to continue communicating here, besides, its six million followers, actually more like seven...

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What has eyes but can't see? A blind person.

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What's awesome and looks like a pumpkin? An awesome pumpkin.

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Q: what's red, green and goes over 100 miles per hour? A: a frog in a blender

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knock knock who's there? the paperboy the paperboy who? i lied, i'm a serial rapist, you should have looked through the peephole

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How do you make a black man cry? Stab his wife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops