how do you know if your friend is your best friend? if he cries you cry, if he laughs you laughs, if he jumps out a window you laugh again.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and broke its head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be very mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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Womens rights

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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Why was the little kid sad at a funeral. He was actually happy and he was at six flags

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I am white, you are black, we can be friends, racism was abolished.

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how do you make a door cry? twist its nob

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did the old man die? He was old.

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what did the blind, deaf, retarded child, without any arms or legs get for Christmas? nothing, his parents are dead

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How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

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Why cant jonny walk? He has no legs.

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's nothing else I want to say

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Q:What's black and white and red all over? A: An interracial couple in a car crash.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

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What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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A man invites his Irish friend to his house. "Would you like something to drink?" the man asks. "Just kidding, we don't have any drinks." Later, they die of dehydration.

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Your existance.

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What is the difference between me and you? I am not readin this joke.

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Poop

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how do you get a 1 armed moron out of a tree? you wave

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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