What did the brown guy say to the black person when he got fired? Nothing, did you think this was going to be racist or something?!

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How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

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A man walked into a bar. That must have really hurt him.

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There was a guy and a girl naked in bed, sleeping together. When they woke up they didn't remember the last 72 hours and wanted some questions answered, including Where am I? Who are you? What year is it? What's my name?

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Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

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My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

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What did the doctor say to the morbidly obese man? "You should get on a diet. It's a surprise you're even alive for so long with such a bad heart" The next day the man dies while eating celery.

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How do you drown a blonde? Well there are a few ways, including holding her head underwater until she passes out and then leaving her in the pool.

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Two men were walking down the road when one of them spotted an old lamp lying in a ditch. After examining the lamp's handiwork for several seconds one man rubbed the lamp with his shirt sleeve. The men then continued down the road.

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What did the rock say to the other rock? Nothing they're rocks? What did the tree say to the other tree? Nothing they're both trees? What did the pillow say to the other pillow? Nothing they're both pillows? What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow.

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A man jumped off a cliff. He died.

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What's worse than tornadoes in the USA? Earthquakes in Japan.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face? the skeleton replies I have aids.

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What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

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You know it's sunny outside when you go outside and its sunny

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what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

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what did god say when we made his first black person oops i acidenlty burnt it

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We are few Nero, too few, if I want to split my money with you, would it help you find true happiness?

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a duck walks up to a lemonade stand, says to the man running the stand. quack, because he's a duck

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What's worse than 9/11? a dipped glass of milk

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Why did the black man buy ten packets of Kool-Aid at the supermarket? Because it is a refreshing beverage that many individuals enjoy drinking.

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Q. What did the dead man do after he died? A. Nothing. He's dead.

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whats worse then having sex with a blonde? having sex with a cactus

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Chuck norris doesn't make his own butter he roundhouse kicks the cow and the butter comes straight out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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