Paul walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: no

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Why couldnt jim jump rope? His feet were nailed to the ground.

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What do you get when you cross a pig and a cactus? A godless abomination that violates every ethical standard known to man.

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Why was the boy hanging from the ceiling? He was sad

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You know what makes jokes funny? Irony You know what makes anti-jokes funny? Common sense

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How do you do to stop a baby who is circling? You nail his other feet.

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Knock Knock Who's there? John John who? John Williams.

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How do you know it's a bad day? When your brain does not release a high enough level of seratonin.

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Knock Knock Who's there The military. We're under attack. The military we're under attack who? Dinos

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Why did the parents order the 16 year old daughter to move out of Virginia? Because she lost her virginity

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I never made a mistake. I thought i did once but i was mistaken

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Whats worse than a dog biting you? Cancer.

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A black man and a muslim enter a bar. The Black man pulls out a gun in an attempt to commit a robbery, however the muslim opened his jacket, screamed "Allah Akkbar" and blew himself up. Everyone died.

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What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

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What did the little girl buy for her cat? A box to bury him in.

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what is the difference between batman and a black guy. bat man is white

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What do you call a kid with one arm and an eye-patch? Names.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Your Mother

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How do you make a baby fly? Hit it's mother in the stomach.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I´ll give anything to be screw by you.

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96 there mad at each other instead its 69

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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why did the guitar player cross the road? to play his gig

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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