knock! knock! Whos there? Chris Hansen..

Penis.

Why did the elephant cross the road? To get to the other side.

There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane..."

A man with a broken arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I broke my arm, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

9 Cats on a boat. One Jumped off, how many left? 8.

What happened when the Trayvon Martin was shot? The media made a huge deal about it and is now making ridicoulus claims that George Zimmerman is racist, and such claims are infringing on his right to a fair trial, and it's all because Trayvon Martin is black.

What happens to the blond when she reaches the top of the stairs She falls down them

What's worse than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit. What's worse than a dead baby in a clown suit? Ten dead babies in a trash-can. What's worse than ten dead babies in a trash-can? One dead babie in ten trash-cans.

How many people of a certain demographic does it take to change a light bulb? x+1 (x >0), 1 person to change the lightbulb and x to behave in a manner consistent with the established stereotype of said demographic.

What did the father tell his son who was caught stealing from the teacher? --The father didn't say anything because he walked out on his family when the children were born.

Why did the man get a tattoo? A: he wanted to express himself.

You're walking down a street and you see a man struggling to open a door, what do you do? Whatever you feel like doing.

a blind man walks off a cliff..... he's dead now.

An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

A girl walks into a strip club, she was tired of her husband and wanted to see how it was actually done.

There's two Cherys in a bath one chery asks the other one to pass the soap the other chery said what do I look like, a typewriter?

Your mother is average.

Why did Silly Billy throw a clock out the window? Because he has a serious anger problem.

knock knock whos there? IRS Oh....

Knock Knock! Who's there? Santa isn't real.

roses are red violets are blue i'll be back in an hour or two

when life givs you lemons you say no thank you i dont take food from strangers

Why did Chuck Norris start crying? Because he was in a coma

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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