so a blind man walks into a bar, then a chair, then a table.

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An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

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Q. How do you make time fly? A. It is highly impossible to make time fly for there is 24 hours in a day, 60 minutes in an hour, and 60 seconds in a minute so therefore the time flows how it should and we do not have such power to do it even though many people claim they do when they know they really don't

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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Q: How did the black man get the white man's money? A: He walked up, politely asked if he could borrow some money, and told him he would pay him back tomorrow.

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose... But you cannot be a dinosaur!

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A: The live one at the bottom trying to eat his way out. Q: What's worse than that? A: When he comes back for more.

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Why did the african man wear no clothes? Because he liked being naked.

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Why can't Abraham Lincoln lie? Because he is dead.

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why did the chair brake? because a car smashed into it. where did it go? all the way to china. whats 3+4? why did the Chinese man get this wrong? Because a chair was in his head.

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Black people.

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Why do women live longer? Once they're sexual and metabolistic hormones are moleculy different from men's, their metabolism is different and act on different organs and vice-versa. Therefore, they live longer. Still, in a worldwide average, more men born than women.

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what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

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knock knock who is there who who who your an owl

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What do you call seven pine trees and a roll of toilet paper? Mongoloid.

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roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

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What did the man say to the cat. ~It doesn't matter it impossible for 2 Species to Communicate between one another.

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What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

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What's funnier than a dead baby? -A dead baby sitting next to a kid with Down Syndrome.

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guy walks into a bar.... Ouch.

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A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve You, but don't start anything."

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what do you get when you see jonny cry-a monkey lol

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Why did the dog lick the boy's leg? Cause when the boy blew up his leg landed in the doghouse

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Q. why did the black man cross the road? A. Cause there is no law saying he cant

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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