Q: Whats different about pizza and jewish people? A: Pizzas don't scream in the oven.

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What did Madeline McCann get for Christmas? Nothing she's dead.

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Q:why did the man jump of the house A:he did not I threw a frige at him

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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Alpine Ibexes climb nearly 90 degree angles to lick salt deposits off mountain sides. They crave that mineral.

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How do black people vote? They go to their polling place, register, then vote for their candidate on election day.

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what's worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it~? lots of things.

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What did the no-arm, no-leg, paraplegic orphan with cancer get for christmas? Pregnant.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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On the next line im going to write a joke: George W. Bush

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whats helen kellers favorite activity fingering herself

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There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

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Knock knock whose there nobody you have no friends remember

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What's blue, and smells like fish? A firetruck, I was kidding about the blue and fish.

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Q: What is the difference between a horny college girls and a horny high school girl? A: Usually, an age will seperate people in different grades. Also, what grade their in.

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Why did the fat man fall off the swing? Because he weighed 855 pounds and it broke.

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how long does it take a meth-head to rob your flat? not long at all, and they'll take everything. they need to, it's an addiction

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Why were the 3 men wearing black suits? They just left their mothers funeral, she died of terminal cancer.

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Lucas talks to mom she says hi

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Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

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What did the speech impaired man say ? Nothing.

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A man walks into a bar. He hasn't been there before, and it's a Friday so it's really crowded, and it's really quite a dive, so he and his girlfriend decide to leave and find somewhere else to eat.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know chickens are absent minded creatures that can aimlessly walk around.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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