How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her she is a burnette.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attached to a bomb filled with spoons

When life gives you lemonade, give life lemons and it'll be like WTF?!

What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

roses are red violets are blue my dick is long longer then you

What did the elderly lady say to the man? You still have not repaid my services

What do you call a man who tripped on a rock? A man who tripped on a rock.

Your mommas so fat she jumped into the ocean and immediately had to start swimming.

Q: What did Michael Jackson do while he was preparing for his newest world tour? A: He died.

How do you get a nun pregnant? Artificial insemination.

Q: Why is it so that antijokes often give you a funny answer? A:.... *hayroll* *crickets* Moral: Im the MoranautBitch!

Yo mama's so fat when they asked her if she wanted fries with that she said yes

guys cmon dont make fun about abbie make fun of josh brown WHAT A NOOB

why didnt the little boy say goodbye to his mom because he got hit by a bus

A woman walks into a bar but is promptly returned to her kitchen by an officer of the law. Later that same evening, she is beaten mercilessly by her husband for her outright disrespect for the social restrictions imposed upon her gender.

A one armed blond is in a tree, how to you get her to come down? You wave to her?

Whats the Difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? A Pile of dead babies is basically useless

roses are red violets are black lewis norris has a fucking narra back

Why is Timmy afraid of x-rays? The last time Timmy had an x-ray, the radiation was too much for him, giving him terminal cancer, which also explains why he will die in the next 24 hours.

Girl goes to see a sex therapist. Girl says, "Doc, though this has never been a problem, for the past 3 months I have been unable to reach climax. Can you help me?" Doc says, "Yes.". And after an intense 18 months of therapy the doctor helped the girl to discover that her inability to reach climax was related to issues of childhood sexual abuse. And after another 36 months of therapy the girl finally found the courage to confront and forgive her unrepentant abuser, as she realized that by not forgiving him, it was like drinking poison while hoping that he would die. And though the doctor did help her,as he had said, the girl never regained her ability to reach climax again.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger Stand a little taller Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone What doesn't kill you is a bad attempt on your life.

mom.what is red and green? dad. what? mom. your mama dad. you Mack me cry mom gooooooooooooooooood girl. mom have you seen gmom mom.no dad. your mom killed her girl. rely mom. yes girl.thanks she suck dick for money and now i have to get a new bed so thanks mom.ya dad. so you want to be dead mom and girl. or u want to be dead dad. help me plz nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo mom.yes girl yes

An Irishman walks out of a pub. Just kidding.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Thats a matter of opinion

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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