What did the orange say to the apple? Nothing, fruits can't talk.

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roses are red violets are blue does this smell like chloroform

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Your mom is so hairy... it doesn't even seem like she underwent chemotherapy for her breast cancer a few months ago.

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What the difference between some stoned and someone drunk? When your drunk you think having a good time even when you not and when you stoned your so high you think your a dragon ball z character.

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How high is a Chinaman

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What colour are blackberries? Purple.

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Why was the teenage girl pregnant? She got raped by her dad.

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What did the teenage girl get for just sweet 16? An abortion

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What do you call a rich black man? A auntrapanour who simply enjoys making more money than any average person

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hello

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My dad is lactose intolerant. He shouldn't eat cheese.

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Me too.

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What's worse than losing a contact Having a bloody stool

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Why is Henrik so AWESOME? Cos HE just IS!!!!

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Why did the baby cross the road? Becuz it was stapled to the chicken.

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Lucy laughed at the joke. Then realised she had gangrene.

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What's in a bag of dead babies? Dead babies and one alive baby eating it's way out.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen. Its was her funeral

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why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

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What's worst than finding a repeated joke on anti-joke? Finding a grammatical error on anti-joke.

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A chicken walks into asda/walmart The person at the counter says: "What can I get you?" The chicken says: "Cluck"

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Sorry, had it not been for my contacts, you would all have ended up in prison because of "The Wiz", I know you got a clean plate, but this guy was doing some seriously dirty laundry claiming to be working for "The Order", again it is best you all keep low, I will make sure my men evacuate this place as soon as we have rigged the game to your favor. As far as we can tell, he was the only one leaking Intel, but I suggest you keep an close eye on the rest of your boys and girls.

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What do you call the worst band ever? Nickelback.

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says "I'm not feeling to good doc." and the doctor says "Thats because you have a fatal brain tumor and probably don't have too long to live."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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