What do you call a midget on the moon? A midget.

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What's creepy about a loving couple having sex? I made them do it.

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once you go black you prefer not to date any white people

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What did the father say to his gay son? "Finish your homework."

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What did the lamp say to the pencil? Nothing. Lamps and pencils are inanimate objects and are also non sentient so therefore are incapable of talking or listening or having any emotions.

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Friends are like trees, They fall down if you hit them several times with an axe.

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What's the difference between an orange? The horse because the vest has no sleeves.

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http://anti-joke.com/anti-joke/popular/a-paper-cut-is-a-trees-last-revenge

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What has two wheels and a handle bar? A bike.

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A man walks into a bar... The steal bar hurt his face and had to get stitches.

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A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

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(402)217-6102 that is Jesse

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What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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Why did Sally fall off her bike? Because she had no legs. Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. What did Sally get for Christmas? Cancer. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally...

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What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

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Little Jack Horner sat in a corner, Dead.

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am a dog.

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Whats black and white and red all over Racial violence

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Bacon makes everything delicious, yes? And coffee makes everything exciting, yes? Put the two together and you get a caffeinated porky roller coaster in your mouth.

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Q.Why did the boy fail to complete his homework? A. He was a loaf of bread

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"I never want to see you again!" shouted Stevie Wonder to the genie in the bottle, as a young boy.

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Who has big muscles and is good at wrestling? A wrestler

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Someone said "catch" and threw a bowling ball at him.

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A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar mans asks ''so, what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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