Why did the teacher get mad at the student? Because he ran over him with a car.

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Why was the jew crying? He just found out his newborn baby had twenty minutes to live.

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My name is Jeff

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What do you call a teenager who cant add? A Total Failure

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How many baby can u fit in a cup? A: it depends how strong ur blender is How do you get them out? A: tortilla chips

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How do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family...

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My left foot has 6 toes, my right face has 8 Q-tips -Matt

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What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

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What do you call a bunch of white people walking down a cliff? Avalanche

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What's in a bag of dead babies? Dead babies and one alive baby eating it's way out.

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What was the blind man's favorite game? Marco Polo

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How do you milk a cow? Pull on its' utters.

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Why did the man's pants fall down? He was not wearing a belt and had recently lost some weight.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to his mother's funeral.

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What's black and is hanging from a tree in my backyard? Avocados.

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A black man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" He says as the Klu Klux Klan beat him with sticks

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family

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Why did the little boy fall asleep? His parent pulled the plug.

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Why is the horny toad named that way? Because its a misnomer of the horned lizard.

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

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Cleavlin has a shmaaala dik

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How did the mecanic die? He drowned

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One day a man named Tyler put a picture of an Asian in his wallet and proceeded to call himself Asian even though he was of Caucasian. Then a theif pick pocketed his wallet and was confused.

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Sorry, had it not been for my contacts, you would all have ended up in prison because of "The Wiz", I know you got a clean plate, but this guy was doing some seriously dirty laundry claiming to be working for "The Order", again it is best you all keep low, I will make sure my men evacuate this place as soon as we have rigged the game to your favor. As far as we can tell, he was the only one leaking Intel, but I suggest you keep an close eye on the rest of your boys and girls.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops