*DRRRRIN* Finally someone uses the doorbell.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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Knock Knock Who's there The Holocaust!

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David Copperfield (the magician you moron). "I will now perform my greatest act yet!" Everyone applauded as he put the screaming woman (for effects you know) into the first end of the meatgrinder, and surprisingly grinded meat came out the other side! And the woman? She disappeared... forever! *applause* Moral: BRAVO! BRAVO!

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What's brown and sticky? Shit.

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Why was the man upset? His entire family was murdered, skinned, separated into assorted body parts, and stapled to trees.

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knock, knock who's there? boo boo who? sorry i dont know anyone named boohoo so get the hell off my lawn

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A jew, a black, and a gay are walking together. The black points out a new house.

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What is the difference between a black person and a bicycle? You can sell a bicycle legally.

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Q :Whats the difference between a truck load of bowling balls and a truck load of dead babies? A: I don't have a truck of bowling balls.

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Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

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What do you call a boy that was once a boy, but no longer is a boy? A Man

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whats white and black, and red all over, kiren poping jacob cherry

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What's the difference a black person and a park bench? A park bench is a object and a black person is human.

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Why did the fat person build a lift in his house? He was caring for his terminally ill mother which has a cancer and got both her legs amputated due to the cancer spreading to her legs.

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mental kid

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Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

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Opinions are like assholes, neither one can ride a bike, except for the assholes

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Knock Knock Knock" "Knock knock Knock who?" "Just let me in, you twat, it's freezing out here!"

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How do you make someone laugh at a funeral? Laughing gas How do you make someone cry at a birthday party? Tear gas How do you make someone high at a wedding? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - There are many ways to get high in a wedding. Gas is not the only option.

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Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and due to genetics could not see well without the help of glasses.

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why is your mother dead? because i killed him.

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How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff card at the bottom of a pool.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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