what do you get when you give an eevee a french stone? Napoleon!!!

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A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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What do you get when you cross a parrot and a beach ball? A beach ball with a parrot design on it.

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What did the single woman get for Christmas? Raped.

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars...except for the duck

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was struck by a car and killed instantly by the impact.

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What do you get when you cross a peanut and a snake? peanutsnake

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Why do Asian Women have small boobs? Because anything under A is unacceptable.

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What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing

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What do you call a dead man in a ditch? Phil.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she is blind.

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What do you call it when you kill a Jewish homosexual? Murder.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Stab her.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a prison. They're stopped by a gang. Hey, want to play a game? They answer "No thanks, we died in the last joke."

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What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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What's the deal with airplane food? I've never tried it. I'm just curious how it was.

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why are black people so good at basketball? because they understand the fundamentals, work hard at becoming better, and have fun playing the game/

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What is the difference between a shark and a human? A shark is a type of fish with a full cartilaginous skeleton and a highly streamlined body and a human is the only living species in the Homo genus.

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What's the only thing more horrible than trash can full of dead babies? A live one at the bottom. What's more horrible than that? He has to eat his way out. What's more horrible than that? He goes back for more. What's more horrible than that? This all took place in my garage while I was watching.

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Me and my wife set and watch the eleven o'clock news every night. My wife always thinks that she has the different disease that is mentioned each day. One night she was practically in tears telling me that she had the disease that was talked about that night. I looked at her and said "honey, there is no way that you have testicular cancer. You don't even have testiculars." The End

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Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

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What was little Timmy's final words? I just want to go home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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