Whats worse then getting shot in the leg? Getting shot twice in the leg

If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Q: What would you do if i pushed you down the stairs A: I would suffer from serious head injuries thus filling you with guilt for performing such a deed.

Q: what did the black man say after the white man said knock knock A: who's there

What's long, hard and full of semen? A penis

what is the ??? crust^2 + Cool Whip

Why did the blonde fall off the cliff? She was blind and deaf so she never knew where to go, and her parents kicked her out for her problems. It is a sad situation that noone wants to go through

What does 2 + 2 equal? 4

Roses Are Red...Rolo's Are Round....Pull Down Your Pants And Let's Down!

How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to his mother's funeral.

Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

LAST COMMENT? DISGUSTIIIING! NO YOU TAKE IT!

How do you stop an oncoming bus? You push a stroller in front of it.

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

Duck: got any grapes? Lemonade Seller: no the duck waddeld away and never came back for the guy has no grapes

I have read and agree to the terms of midget sex service - View Terms of Service

Apparently I'm an unfit father, cuz all I know is dope and all I got is 30 dollas

What do you get when you kill justin beiber? A medal..

What's the worst part about rollerblading? Telling your dad that you're gay.

What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

Q.what has big ears? A.your vagina.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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