Q. What's the best thing to do before you get in a car accident? A. There's actually not much you can do in a car accident, considering you probably will never expect it, and it happens relatively too fast to react.

Q: If you are running a race and a fridge hits you, how many dogs play x-box in the snow? A: 12 orange waffles

Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: Names

what did the black man eat for dinner? whatever his wife makes for him to eat

How many Jews fit in an oven? Nein

What is 1+1? It's 2!

An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.

What is the biggest lie in the world How the **** should I know

A man who was not blind, but could not see, walks around a metal bar, and proceeds to the bar, where he walks into the door without opening it first

What do you call shark with no dorsal fin? Unused ingredients for soup.

THE GAME.

How do you get a n***r out of a tree? Cut the rope

A women walks into a bar which is means she is pretty rich to be able to have a bar in her kitchen

whats worse than being late to school haveing your family killed by an angry peice of toast

what did helen keller say to the nazi? -nothing, helen keller was blind and deaf so she could never aquired the ability to speak

Are yu mad Twinkle twinkle little star if yu don't shut up I'm gonna hit you with my freaking car

"hey woody can i ask you a question" "sure buzz" "why is it your name is woody but they use me as a vibrator"

Roses are red Violets are blue I have down syndrome duh dusfy druah

Q)Why doesn't the blond have a job? A) he is 12

Two scientists walk into a bar The first says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O, too.” Both of them receive water because the bartender is not irresponsible enough to serve concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

Your mother's so fat.....When she gets on the scale, it tells her how much she weighs

"What would you do if i gave you a million dollars?" "I would scream and jump up and down? Are you really gonna give me a million dollars?" "No i just wanted to see what you would have said, that's all"

Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

Q: How did the robber steal a laptop from best buy? A: With his hands

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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