What's worse than losing a contact Having a bloody stool

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Lucy laughed at the joke. Then realised she had gangrene.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why is Henrik so AWESOME? Cos HE just IS!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the baby cross the road? Becuz it was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the woman leave the kitchen. Its was her funeral

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man walks into the doctor's office and says "I'm not feeling to good doc." and the doctor says "Thats because you have a fatal brain tumor and probably don't have too long to live."

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why is the horny toad named that way? Because its a misnomer of the horned lizard.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

I have a friend named David. He then lost his ID, now we called him Dav

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's worst than finding a repeated joke on anti-joke? Finding a grammatical error on anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call the worst band ever? Nickelback.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A chicken walks into asda/walmart The person at the counter says: "What can I get you?" The chicken says: "Cluck"

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Sorry, had it not been for my contacts, you would all have ended up in prison because of "The Wiz", I know you got a clean plate, but this guy was doing some seriously dirty laundry claiming to be working for "The Order", again it is best you all keep low, I will make sure my men evacuate this place as soon as we have rigged the game to your favor. As far as we can tell, he was the only one leaking Intel, but I suggest you keep an close eye on the rest of your boys and girls.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

"Hheheheh Hey Butthead"- "Were Gonna Score!"

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: what did batman say to robin before they got into the car? A: get in the car (:

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How many alzheimers patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's black and is hanging from a tree in my backyard? Avocados.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How can you tell the difference between a black man and a white man? Quite easily actually.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How do you get Doctor Phil in a bikini? Give him a little alcohol to ease inhibitions and offer him a suitable bribe.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's the difference between Jordan and Time? Time passes!!

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why is my girlfriend pregnant? We wanted an abortion

thumb_up thumb_down -27

I feel like making a good joke.But i cant. YN

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's the difference between ice cream and babies? I don't stick babies in my freezer...

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops