What did the man say when his wife said hello? Hello.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face? the skeleton replies I have aids.

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Q: What do a dollar bill and a kite have in common A: I dont know

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Why did the black guy not tip his pizza driver? Because he didn't order pizza.

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Why did the Asian man have to sit down to pee? Because he had no legs.

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Your cat was in pain after after a stack of books suddenly fell on it. It's pain is extra-strong so you give it ExtraStrength Tylenol. Guess what happens next time? Nothing. It takes only 50mg to 60mg of Tylenol to poison a cat. 1 ExtraStrength Tylenol tablet is about 10 times that amount (500mg). You killed your cat. It's dead now and there is no "next time"..

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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whats green andthrows forks at you? a blonde painted green in a bush wih a gun and a fly on her eye

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What do you call a three toed 9 foot man. His name.

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Why did the boy lick the window? He had Down's syndrome

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A horse walks into a bar, the barman says why the long face, the horse says, my dad died this morning.

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Two muffins are put in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "is it just me or is it getting hot in here?". The other muffin says,"HOLY CRAP!!!!! A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!".

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What's the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? One's a sick duck; the other regrets having you as a child.

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The guy told a funny joke. Why wasn't the other guy laughing? Because he was having a heart attack

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Why do black people play basketball? Because they can join their friends in playing an extremely fun and calorie-burning sport.

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Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

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If I were a cat, would you help with the toast?

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What's black and is as fast as a car? A black car.

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Why do cats have eyes? So they can see.

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Wat do u call black circus clwon a bad comedian

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whats funny about anti jokes? nothing hince the name ANTI.

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What is the difference between the number 20 and 21 1

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There was an american man on the way to work.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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