what did the alcholic get his children for christman, nothing i lied about the children. Another joke by rangler thumbs up for more.

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4 black men wearing ski masks and stripped jumpers kicked my door open and ran into my house knocking over and breaking things. They then realised this was not their friends house, apologised, paid for the damaged and left for the fancy dress party.

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Hey! That's mine! Give it back!

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so a huge calculator walks into a bar, and a man steps out from behind it, and wipes his forehead.

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-Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? -No. -Well niether has he.

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What did the hat say to the other hat? Nothing, because hats don't talk, stupid.

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Two swallows migrate to Africa. One swallows initiates the conversation, that's when the other catch fire.

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A black guy and a white guy are in a fight, who wins The white guy because they were in a fight over when the black guy was going to die.

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Knock knock Who's there? Illiteracy.

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What should someone do if they are Le Zirk? Have a zirk. THEN FIRE THE ZIRKKK!!!!!!!

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An Arab walks into a bar. He doesn't explode, and has a fun time with his friends.

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If you give a man a fish, he'll eat it.

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Person 1: today my doctor said I'm dyslexic Person 2: oh yeah? Are you ahdd too?

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what do you call a man with no @ss? d1ckhead

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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An unarmed man robbed a bank today, he failed because he had no way of carrying the cash out.

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roses are black violets are grey... im color blind sorry

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I didn't use protection So here's your baby

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? The Holocaust is not an idea of the slightest humor at all. Millions of innocent civilians were slaughtered, millions more were sent to brutal concentration camps where they would fight for a crumb of food on the ground and get terribly punished for it, and live their whole lives in pain, torture, and starvation, millions more were sent to concentration camps then murdered, and millions of people, including children were left without family or anywhere to live. On top of that, their whole lives they were mistreated for their differences, and never got to live up to their dreams because of this horrifying event. It left the world in shock for years after, and scars of the event still live on in present-day families whose ancestors were harmed in the Holocaust. The terrible memory of it will never leave this Earth.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? The victim of a freak genetic mutation and extremely susceptible to predators, meaning it will live a short life in the wilderness.

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why are jews so cash hungry? because like the rest of us they are looking for a way to survive and feed their family.

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Why was the baby crying? Because it was on fire.

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Bob Saget

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Rose: Mummy, why did you name me Rose? Mother: Because a rose fell on your head when you were a baby Daisy: Mummy, why did you name me Daisy? Mother: Because a daisy fell on you when you were a baby Fridge: durr hurr Mother: Shut up, Fridge

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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