What is green, brown, has four legs and would kill you if it fell on you from out of a tree? A pool table

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What's worse than cutting yourself? Deadly tornadeos.

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Name a country that begins with the letter U A. True B. False C. All of the above D. None of the above

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There once was a man from Peru, he dreamt he was eating his shoe, he then woke up, took a shower, changed, and drove to work.

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what did the apple say to the peer... I taste better !!

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Jim Jim who? Oops, wrong house.

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What's brown and sticky? A Stick!

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An astronaut walks into a bar. He orders a beer. After waiting for about 1 and a half minutes he receives his beer. The bartender says it was 3 dollars. The astronaut checks his wallet and finds no money so he pays with credit card. The bartender swipes his credit card but the card doesn't work. So the astronaut takes out his debit card. When the bartender swipes the debit card it worked. In relief the astronaut looks at the bartender and says "Thank you" and then goes home.

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why wont our kids have time to socialize? because theyll all be too busy trying to find a solution for global warming.

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im not food

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A man walks into a bar carrying a piece of asphalt under his arm. The bartender says, "We don't serve construction workers here."

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Did you hear about Billy's magic trick? No? Don't worry, it was a trick question.

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how did santa ruin christmas? he didnt put presents under familys tree's

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought is was yours.

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What is the answer to this joke? Cuz fuck you that's why.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Hi. Hi Who? Hi who?! Hi Ho Hi HO. Its off to work we go!! umm.

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you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

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What doesn't kill you makes you injured

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What's 1 + 1? Fish. What's 2+2? Window. pie.

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What did one Platypus say to the other Platypus? Nothing, Platypuses can't talk. However, they are the only mammal to lay eggs.

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In mediavel times :A Jew rapes his mom.... He is promptly taken out of society and thrown into a lions den due to his act of imortality.

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hey i just met you,but this is crazy, my name is kony and i just took your baby

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What's the difference between a baby and hot dog? I don't put ketchup on my hot dog when I eat it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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