My uncle said to me that life is like a box of chocolates But I'm lactose intolerant

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A boy walks into a shop He buys some sweets.

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A man is walking in a bar and then leaves once he gets his drink

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What did Harry Potters owl say to Harry Potter? delivowe for hawwy potter!

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What is three times more dangerous than war? Three wars.

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Hey whats sad about 4 black people going over a cliff in a cadillac. Nothing

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What do you call a Pokemon without a trainer? A wild pokemon.

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What did the Shark attack victim say just before she died from her injuries? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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How did the dinosaurs die???? How the Heck do I kno?

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Q. What's the definition of mixed emotions? A. Watching your attorney drive off a cliff in your new car.

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This is my favorite antijoke.

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Hellen Keller walks into a bar. Well, at least she thinks she did.

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What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish.

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How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

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Why did the blonde fall down the stairs? Somebody tripped her.

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What do you call your mom after she brings a guy home from a bar? A very caring woman because she doesn't want him driving drunk.

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Patient- Doctor! I feel like a piece of ****! Doctor- What is ****? Patient- It's four dots on the computer screen representing a curse word. Doctor- What computer screen?

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why is king kong so fat? because he eats to mucj

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Why can't the Mexican float? He never learned the proper technique as he was not allowed to take swim class.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A. Treadmil

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A black man and a white man enter a public toilet. They both begin to pee at the urinals. The whiteman peers over to the blackman mid-pee. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype and then blushes embarassed by his own latent homosexuality. They both leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep later that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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A man walks into a bar. The second man sees the first man's mistake and ducks. The third man needs to take no precautions as he is a midget and can simply walk under the bar.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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