What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

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How you know when dislextic

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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What did the fly say when he went to Dunkin Donuts? Can I have a doughnut?

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Why did Sally failed gym class Because she couldn't do push ups

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Why couldn't the grandma remember what she did last night? Because she has Alzeihmers and grandmas don't do anything.

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Why did Jimmy never like old people? Because he was abused as a child by one.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could DO YO MOMM!!!

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What did Mr. Sandman do whrn the boy asked for one too many dreams, nothing because Mr. Sandman was the boys bitch.

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Where's my tractor?

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haha black people :D

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What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty eight year olds? They are of the legal age

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What did the man say to g**guy we are both g**

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Guy 1: why are you being such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most pussy

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Knock Knock Who's There 42

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What's black and red and on the ground? A dead black guy.

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What did Lois say to Peter? Who cares... Family Guy is a stupid show.

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What's the difference between an alligator and an argyle sweater? There are far too many conceivable differences between the two objects to be able to give an actual definite variance between them.

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knock knock who's there? it's I, your son. ....... what? dad let me in, it's cold! i don't have a son.... but.... i love you... get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

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Nicole: Shove it where the sun don't shine! Katlyn: I'm richer than you! Nicole: Shut your frickin' mouth! Katlyn: You'll be bankrupt! (This conversation was recorded while Nicole and Katlyn were playing Monopoly. They both died in a car accident later that day...)

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What do you call a moving tree? A hurricane killing thousands of people and 3 dogs.

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roses are red violets are black lewis norris has a fucking narra back

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What do you call an African American who flies a plane? A Pilot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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