Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

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Which came first the egg or the chicken? The chicken because eggs can't cross the road

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face." the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer."

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Guy 1: "Hey, you have some updawg on your face." Guy 2: "Oh, thanks. Did I get it?" Guy 1: "Yeah, I think so."

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Why was the man sad after mowing is lawn? He ran over his dog.

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Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

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Why did the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a truck

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why did aodhan not play BO2? Aodhan has Cerebral palsy.

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Why couldn't the old man play the piano? His arthritis caused him great pain.

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What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

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What do you call a Black guy picking cottnon? A cottonpicker

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Why mommy upset cause wet and sticky make mommy upset

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Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Vast. While they are both mammals belonging to the order Carnivora, and therefore have a loose evolutionary connection, dogs belong to the Carnidae family and cats belong to the Felidae family. There would need to be much biological research done to discover all of the differences that result from this.

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAA HAHAHAaaa WHYYYYYYYYY!?

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What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

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Why did the girl fall off the couch? She had a seizure.

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Limericks are fun, I have an orange Nothing rhymes with orange crap orange

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Whats red and you can't see it? No Tomatoes

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A guy and a girl had sex, it was casual.

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In Soviet Russia, there are communists.

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Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

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(insert antijoke here

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops