what do you call an elevator full of white people. a box of crackers

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What's better then petting a lion? Petting a lion and not getting eaten

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Two muffins are sitting in the oven. One says wow its hot in here the other muffin said HOLY SHIT ITS A TALKING MUFFIN

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If you are American when you walk into a bathroom and American when you walk back out, what are you when you are inside the bathroom? You're probably dispelling waste products from your body.

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Bill: ask me if i am three ducks in a man suit Jim: are you three ducks in a man suit? Bill: yes

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An asian is doing math hw then his dad drives through the door

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What did the pear say to the orange? Orange ya gonna say hi? What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk.

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What's red, black, and green all over? A dead black bear. Just no green.

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hey did you hear about Osama bin laden? He was found by the CIA and killed on account of his atrocious actions.

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White men's rights

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Why couldn't the duck fly? It died.

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what is meaningless and not fun at all? that joke

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Whats worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being stabbed.

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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bish bash bosh giz a nosh

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Corn Muffins

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What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

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A: u wanna die? B: does anyone really wanna die, i mean logistically, un-less u are suicidal, why would you wanna die? A: I do wanna die. B: ur a freak and you should consider getting help person A never got help, on his way to getting help at a certified physician he got hit by a bus, his body can be found at the intersection of church ave. and flatbush. And i would say rest in piece but cars drive over him daily, and thats not to peaceful

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what did the indians give the pilgrims? syphylis

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How do you wake up a black man? You stab him in the thigh.

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Nothing, he was in tremendous pain.

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What's Black/White and red all over? Obama when he gets a little flustered.

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A blond Canadian and his Korean friend are going together to Korea. When checking in the person asks the Canadian if he has a return ticket leaving the country. He replies yes but he does not have it on him. According to Korean Customs and Immigration laws a non-Korean citizen must have a return ticket to enter the country. Inevitably follows a long and tedious process in order to procure the ticket in order to pass customs. The Korean and the Canadian continue to their boarding gate.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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