Knock, knock. Who's there? The IRS.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Guy 1 : "I like your hat." Guy 2: "That's my hair, you moron."

thumb_up thumb_down -10

i used to think i had the coolest secret handshake with helen keller. then i realized she was talking sh*t about me

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Ellen: Knock knock Steve: Who's there? Ellen: Banana Steve: Banana who? Ellen is offline and can't receive messages right now.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why do my feet smell so bad? because i havent washed them for 5 days

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son Scotty was grabbed by the sexual predator 4 blocks from the school, and your daughter Sally tried to run and is now under the wheels on the bus going round and round.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why does annie put 2 balls together? bacuse its makes a BUTT! oo

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What was hitlers least favorite pokemon? Hitler didnt have a least favorite pokemon because hitler died long before the idea of pokemon was created.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whats worse than dieing in an airplane? jumping out of the airplane to save yourself and emediatly getting shredded by the massive engine you did not have the wits to see.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder have in common? They're both well known figures who have inspired many.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is long and black? The line at KFC

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

thumb_up thumb_down -10

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats worse than being white and in harlem on the 4th of july? Your schizophrenic father leaving you a voicemail detailing the politics of successful encounters with prostitutes.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What starts with F and ends in UCK? Firetruck. What starts with P and ends in ORN? Popcorn. What starts with S and ends in HIT? Shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A vodka please Sir this is McDonald's Ok sorry, a McVodka please

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's sicker than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill death ratio

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What has a head but can't see? A penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is worse-losing your phone or failing school? Apartheid

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what does a beer and a priest have in common? They both are cold refreshing beverages, except for the priest.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

you suck

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops