What's worse than Jedward? Nothing. They are really and truly awful.

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why did the packers win the superbowl? because they were very good

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Why did the man eat the cheese? because the man was a mouse

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what happened when the boy jumped? he landed

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Tim: Hey Jennifer, do you wanna hear a joke? Jennifer: Okay Tim: Knock knock Jennifer: Who's there Tim: It's me Tim, you idiot

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An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Nothing, the mouse was incapable of speech due to the elephants actions.

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Why did the goat cross the street? It was running away from the Tsunami

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Miranda Cosgrove's singing career. ......Thats it. Thats the joke.

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1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

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How did a baby get across the street? Stapled to a chicken.

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A man walked into a bar. He was only 19, but technically a man. Underage drinking is not O.K.

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A girl accidentally clicks on an advertisement while on anti-jokes.com, the girl silently curses and quickly presses the back button.

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How old are you? 20

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What happened when the man got into the taxi? The driver shot him 17 times in the chest and ran away

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my eyes hurt from what? being open too much

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no sense Microwave

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whats stupid and gay all of my friends

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A blonde enters a bar and orders an elevator.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? 0. There are no lights at Auschwitz.

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OK, so there's this blonde driving down the road in her brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 Lamborghini. She's cruisin' about 95, radio blaring, having a great time. She comes up on this trucker who is carrying a double-wide home and is taking up both lanes. To her disliking, he is only going about 45. To get the point across that she wants to get past, she decides to tailgate him. So, she gets to within a foot of his rear bumper. The trucker looks back and sees her on his ass, and motions for her to get off of it, but to her it looks like a wave and she waves back. Since her first attempt was futile, she decided to get a little closer and begin flashing her headlights, hopefully making herself more visible in the process. Once again the trucker sees her on his ass, and this time motions for her to pull over to the side of the road. The trucker steps out of his vehicle with a chunk of chalk and draws a circle three feet in diameter in the middle of the road. He instructs her not to move until he tells her to. Naive as she was, she agrees to it and steps inside it. The trucker goes back to his truck and pulls out a 50-ounce Louisville Slugger. He walks over to the Lamborghini and beats it, and beats it, and beats it again. When he is done, all that is left is a brand new, candy-apple red, $125,000 pile of metal. Satisfied, he throws the bat in his truck and walks over to the blonde. When he gets there, to his astonishment, she is rolling around on the street laughing hysterically. He asks her, "Why are you laughing? I just beat the crap out of your car!!" She is laughing too hard to respond, but between giggles he can make out, "While you weren't looking I stepped out of the circle."

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A guy walks into a restaurant. "What would you like?" says the waiter. "A glass of orange juice," replies the man.

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What do you call a man running around town with no clothes on? Naked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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