What would you call a two-foot Irishman named Max? Max.

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? we are both lawyers

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knock, knock who's there owls owls who thats right owls who

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How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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Why did a chicken cross the road? To see The Doors.

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Why did the Jew hate bananas? He was deathly allergic to them.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Whats small and has Aids? Avery..

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Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

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Q: Why is Abu Soooo Dank? A: Because he scores too many left-foot bangers

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Whats faster than a black man running away from the cops? The speed of light.

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What do you call a man who's arms have been amputated? It doesn't matter, he won't be able to pick up the phone.

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Two Jews, three Nazis, and a black guy go into a bar. Where they have a spirited debate about Canadian football. And leave without coming to any conclusions.

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I don't want to share my name yet if that is okay, I mean I have not seen you, but you have seen me just saying. Tell me how old you are first, I am 26, or 27, being more or less an orphan since birth details like that kinda lose themselves. And no, its not Eliza, I will wait for you here if you do not mind, there are still people that have thought I am Nero all this while, that`s what worries me, I doubt I can convince them I am chatting with myself this time around.

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Dyslexics have more nuf!

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Weed.

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how do you make abus driver cry? you rip his limbs off.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing Jenga on September 11th.

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Why did little Lisa fall off the swings? She had no arms

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Why didn't the man jump out of his window when his house was on fire? Because he is afraid of heights.

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How do you kill a diabetic? Take away their insuline

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Person1: wanna hear a joke? Person2: yeah Person1: ok

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Why did the jewish plumber commit suicide? After years abuse from his alcoholic father and rich sibling, he finally snapped and killed himself on his birthday after nobody told him happy birthday.

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How do you get a priest out of a tree? Throw a canoe at him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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