Obese penguin. It died of a heart attack.

What do you call a muslim flying a plane> .....a pilot

Why is Kony so mean? He used to date your mom.

What's wrong with a muslim flying a plane? Nothing you racist

How do you get 100 Africans in a phone box? Throw a can of beans in there.

What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after being hit by a train.

Why did Jimmy eat the apple? Because he was obese and needed to eat healthy because his doctor suggested it.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Nothing. Cats can't talk.

Why did the road cross the chicken? REVENGE

Fill in the blank: Hello my name is ___, and today I would like to ask you why you put your real name in the blank? Posted by: BerserkSpoon

what kind of dog has no tail? a hot dog

Your mother is so morbidly obese that if she sat on me, she would crush my skull and kill me.

Yo mama so stupid, she waited for the stop sign to say go

Woman + Kitchen = sandwich

How many clowns fit in a car? Depends how many get in the car.

Q.what do you call 7x7 A.A math equation

What did Steven Hawking get for Christmas? ------ ------ ------ A bike.

An Icelandic boy hangs himself because of peer pressure. His family mourns for their loss

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long mane?"

Why is Timmy afraid of x-rays? The last time Timmy had an x-ray, the radiation was too much for him, giving him terminal cancer, which also explains why he will die in the next 24 hours.

A priest, a rabbi, and a monk are standing near a cliff. They say that they are of the best religion. The priest jumps off the cliff and says "God save me", he dies. The rabbi says "Allah save me", he dies. The monk says "Buddha save me" he is saved, in relief he says "Oh thank God" he dies

Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana, Jack got high, pulled down his fly, and asked Jill if she wanna. Jill said yes, pulled up her dress, and had a little fun. But stupid Jill forgot the pill, and now they have a son

nobody move, or i'll kill myself, then her!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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