What's up? Well it all depends on your current position, if you are in the center of the Earth then everything would be up. In space there is no gravity so nothing is up. If you don't understand this the sky is up.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

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Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What do people say when a dyslesic person scores a goal in soccer good job that was a nice goal

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Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

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Why didn't the hispanic muslim woman vote for Donald Trump in the 2016 primaries? Because she lives in Connecticut where the primaries have not yet taken place.

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What starts with p and ends in orn? Popcorn

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What do a bike and a human have in common they are both objects

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what did the man say when he walked into the bar? Ouch!

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Q.what happens if a fat man see's a black man? A. the fat man eats the black man thinking that he was chocolate

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How do you make someone laugh? Tell them this joke.

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Thumbs this up

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What do you call a bunch of hobos having sexual intercourse? A soup kitchen

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Two dogs are sitting by a fire hydrant. One turns to the other and says absolutely nothing because dogs can't speak.

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*DRRRRIN* Finally someone uses the doorbell.

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How do people from Indian Hill laugh? Like an Indian, huh, huh, huh!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Too get to the other side. Duuu no one crosses the road to get killed.

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What do you get when you cross a 747 with a passenger train? A large colission with hundreds dead and injured.

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Ellen: Knock knock Steve: Who's there? Ellen: Banana Steve: Banana who? Ellen is offline and can't receive messages right now.

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How do you kill a retard? you shoot him in the head

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Donald Trump

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What do potatoes wear to bed? Potatoes don't sleep and don't wear clothes.

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What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops