What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Finding an apple inside your worm.

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Adam and Eve ate the apple and felt a bit ashamed and stuff. God looked upon them and said, well its just a fucking apple get outta here you kids! Adam and Eve also took things a bit too literal

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Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

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What do you call a mexican man with a rubber toe? Ruberto.

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Yo momma so fat, she has hypertension, diabetes, and a higher risk of heart disease.

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When is a bus not a bus? When it turns into a street

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What do you get when you throw a bagel at a chicken? One less bagel.

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You know what's funny? You can't spell manslaughter without laughter.

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A man tells his wife to leave the kitchen

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What do you call a fat man who can turn slim? I don't know

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What happens when you breed a T-rex and a mammoth? You can't, both animals are extinct.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Your garden's on fire.

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my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

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Q)A man and a women are hiking on a mountain trail. A bear appears. What do they do? A) Die.

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Knock, knock Who's there? It's me Me who? Just open your damn door funny guy it's freezing out here I don't get it

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What is full of water and drowning people A pool

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What has 8 legs and makes women scream? .....Gang rape.

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What did the alchoholic get for his birthday? Nothing. His alchohol abuse split up is family and now he is alone.

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Suicide is never funny Unless it's a clown

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What's the difference between scrambled eggs and scrambled dead babies? I don't like scrambled eggs..

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

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What is black and white and red all over. A pile of dead zebras

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So tell me what’s worse than a baby? A dead baby… Well then what’s worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies… And what’s worse than a pile of dead babies? A live baby sitting on top of a pile of dead babies… And what’s worse than a live baby sitting on top of a pile of dead babies? A live baby eating it’s way out of a pile of dead babies…

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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