What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

No, its just his eye, its infected, he gets fever and well, that is all I should say. Nero is my friend and I do not like it when people lie to him, he is outside having a cigarette, I do not think he wants to speak with you anymore. Bye.

What's sad about an elderly couple who has had a long, fruitful marriage? Nothing.

What do you call a man who interru- SHUT UP!

Which of the following is the reason the Titanic sunk. Select all that apply. A. Iceberg B. No radar C. Late warning D. Put your hands on me Jack E. This ship can't sink F. Over by the bed, the couch G. God himself can't sink this ship Z. All the above X. None of the above Q. Why are you still reading

Q: why did Suzy fall off the swing? A: she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzy.

Why did the baby boy start crying? He got hit with a toaster

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

Why did the boy drop his iceccream?? He got hit by a bus??

Lisa: Omg Karen, just had sex with Ben, his weiner was sooo tiny lol. Ben: I think you sent me the wrong text.

Coldpaly is a good band

Fire is red Water is blue Earth is brown Air is transparent

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

There are two fish in a tank. They both die, tanks are used for warfare.

Why was billy made fun of his whole life? Because he's mentally retarded

Jews

What did the bird say when he was riding the turtle? Weeee...

Why did the man punch the women? I don't know, but he served jailtime

How do you know a black person is in your house? You see him in your house.

ejaculation JLR

What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Walking.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He couldn't, his legs were broken

What do you call a Mexican that swam across the border? An illegal immigrant.

Why did the man shoot himself? Because he already shot his wife.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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