What did the cancer patient say to the other cancer patient? Nothing, he was dead.

J.D. has 10 vaginas and 2 penis's

What do you call a black and white ruler? Barack Obama.

Finding this website has distracted me and has taken up a large majority of my time.

Knock Knock! Who's There? Mike Mike who? Mike who you just called and told to come over Oh ok, come in

What do you call a rollercoaster without a coaster? A roller

what did the homeless person get for Cristmas? nothing.

Why do they call it "Unsweetened Tea?" Did they put sugar in it and then take it back out again?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, wanna f***.

hi

Q. How do you make time fly? A. It is highly impossible to make time fly for there is 24 hours in a day, 60 minutes in an hour, and 60 seconds in a minute so therefore the time flows how it should and we do not have such power to do it even though many people claim they do when they know they really don't

WELCOME TO THE SECRET TOWARDS GOING BEYOND YOUR FIFTH SENSE... UNLOCKING YOUR SIXTH SENSE! (redux:Chronoshift extend Xr`d Utrawave edition) 1, Sound 2. sight 3.touch 4.Smell 5.Taste. 6.Balance? :( 7. Pressure :/ 8. Itch :O 9.Thermoception: Ability to sense heat and cold :S 10.Proprioception: This sense gives you the ability to tell where your body parts are. 11.Coordination. :/ 12. Nociception: In a word, pain. This was once thought to simply be the result of overloading other senses, such as “touch”, but this has been found not to be the case and instead, it is its own unique sensory system. There are three distinct types of pain receptors: cutaneous (skin), somatic (bones and joints), and visceral (body organs). Moral Man the Friendly arsonist, motherpounder: I SHALL GLADLY HELP YOU UNLEASH YOUR 12th SENSE TO ITS FULLEST DEGREE!

A seal walks into a club... the seals freinds later inform him they are now at a bar the seal then walks into the bar... the seal was later beaten to death

Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber where walking in New York . They both get ice cream... then bieber gets hit by a bus.

Why is the light always red? Because the city has been in an economic depression and does not have the money to fix the traffic light's.

what do you call a pond filled with frogs having sex with bacteria is burning there insides while a midget with assburgers is chanting "SMACK THAT BADONKADONK!" racism..

So Helen Keller walked into a bar... and then a chair.... and then a table..

knock knock who's there a tiger Alex proceeds to walk away as there is a tiger at his front door. he then calls the police because of the potential danger. the animal control then apprehends the animal and takes it to an enclosure

Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are....

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree?Cause it was stapled to the cat.

What did the guy say to the campgrounds? It was in tents (get it like intense but it is a pun)

Q:what do you call a black man in a wheel chair? A: a war veteran who accidentally stepped on a land mine while trying to protect his country.

Smeg...

Why did Darren Wilson quick scope Michael Brown? Because he was being attacked, racism is wrong

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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