why does beyonce sing to the left? because it has a catchy tune

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Where does Elmo live? In Sesame Street.

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Roses are Red ?And sometimes yellow ? My mother is mellow ? Billy you have cancer ?

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? Whenever your appointment is scheduled.

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How do you confuse a blonde? I guess the same way you confuse someone of any other hair color.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Put down your barbie. Get in the car.

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How do you tell the difference between a bomb and an Asian? One blows up.

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Why do Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles always smile? Because they enjoy there life even though there both blind.

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What were the muslims doing on the plane? Probably going somewhere that was too far to walk or drive.... just like everyone else on the plane.

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Why do fat people make such good slaves? They're too fat and lazy to escape. Unfortunately, if you want your slave to be fat, you actually have to feed it properly.

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So much with being an author... You with the Feds? The CIA?

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Why did the woman cross the road? Why the hell is she out of the kitchen!

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How many people does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, more people would just make it harder.

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Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

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Knock Knock. Knockin on Heavens door, oh hey come in

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Why did the man lose his job at the orange juice factory? Because the economy is shitty and none of the higher ups are willing to take a pay cut and they’re still paying themselves massive bonuses, the result of which are layoffs across all departments.

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Why did Princess Diana cross the road? Because she wasnt wearing a seat belt.

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Why did greg come to America? Because he wanted visit the states

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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A man and a woman meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony was rubbish but the reception was brilliant

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wh@t d0 y0u c@II @ d0g5sh£t w1th n0 sm£II? 0ID d0gsh£T

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I was very thirsty so I decided to go get some soda.Upon reaching the soda store I discovered a very long line. I decided to leave the line and instead get some milk, unfortunately once again there was a long line at the milk store. Discouraged by still thirsty I decided to try to luck at the punch store. There was a long line there also.

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PLEASE DONT READ THIS OR YOU'LL BE DIED IF YOU DONT THUMBS UP THIS LIKE POST THIS ON 20 MESSAGES OR YOU'RE BEST MAKE THE MOST OF YOUR LIFE WITHIN THE NEXT 7 DAYS

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diarrhea.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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