Did you hear the one about the spoon and the dis running away while the cow jumped over the moon, IMPOSSIBLE! eating material such as the spoon and dish are inanimate objects, and cows cant jump for they weigh from 600 to 1000 lbs.

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What's the difference between a Rabbi and a Priest? One's a Jew, one's a Christian

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Three ladies were seen eating ice cream. One of them was licking the ice cream. Another was sucking the ice cream and the other was biting the ice cream. One of these ladies is currently married. Which one among them is the married lady? The one with a wedding ring on.

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What did the dog say to the cat? I don't know actually

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Why is the ground wet It rained

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Why did the kid fall off the bike? Because he was paraplegic.

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You're such a dork you were found on the bottom of a whale.

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Why did Shakespeare die? It's called life.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Joe Bereta is a member of al Qaeda.

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Why did the man jump in front of the car? He was clinically depressed, his wife left him and took the kids, he just lost his job. He thought he saw a 20 dollar bill in the street So he stopped to pick it up, not realizing a car was speeding toward him.

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My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

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Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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what gets louder as it get smaller? a baby in a blender

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How many dead babies does it take to fill a bathtub? 17.

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What's black and white and has difficulty turning corners? A nun with a javelin stuck through the neck.

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The first cow: are you worried about mad cow disease? the second cow: no, im a helicopter

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What's the difference between liberals and communists? Nothing.

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If an old person falls in the middle of the woods do they make a sound? No their died.

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Feminine hygiene jokes aren't funny. Period

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Whats has no comedic value? A brick

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What did the pregnant teen get for Christmas? A miscarriage

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Loner.

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What's the best Anti-Joke ever? I don't know, but it's NOT this one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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