Knock knock. Who's there? The IRS, please get out of the way.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Your momma is so fat that she's developed a cardiovascular disease and has 5 weeks to live

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Asexuals aren't known for f***ing around.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

you know what? CHICKEN BUTT. butt of chicken ahahahaa

thumb_up thumb_down -13

The big male boar went out the forest, saw a group of women and start to swank.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Guy 1: why are you such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most p***y

thumb_up thumb_down -13

One night, a heartbroken magician named Jeff went to a bar. Jeff met a nice girl, and they talked and laughed together for hours. After a while, Jeff asked her, "do you want to see a magic trick?" She ate his wiener.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A pregnant woman walked into a bar what did she say? Can i have a drink

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a bar.....he then slips on an ice-cube and suffers massive trauma due to the fall. The owner is sued by the mans family and subsequently loses his business. He can no longer provide for his family. His wife is two weeks away from giving birth to their third child.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Oh you're dating my ex? Do you want my unfinished sandwhich too? And my old shoes? And a couple of my shirts I don't wear anymore? How about a my toys I used to play with? Or my spoiled pickle that's been in my car for about a year and a half after I went to the mall with my friends, we watched a movie, I don't remember which one it was but it was funny, then after that we went to McDonald's and it was the first time I heard of McGangbang and it was pretty good. After that I think we went to Jerry's cousin's house, he was a cool guy until I found out that he likes Tyga, so I ended up never talking to him again.... I went off topic, sorry

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Nero, listen, do not try to imply that you created the Iron man method, that was developed by many people over the duration of many years in the former underground society. You seem far too educated to be the savage you claim to be, if I told you that our people will do the uttermost to see if we can fix that eye of yours and succeed, will you forgive my failure and imperfections as a leader? Look at it this way, I am a leader, not a ruler, what my followers do is up to them, but if they cannot understand that they have to pay the consequences behind their actions, they have no place within the order, as for the expression "my order" it is simply what my many followers like for me to say, not because they are unwilling to take responsibility, but as a token of praise. Our articulations and means of expressing desire and such are very much the same, have you ever been part of our order?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

how many dead babies can fit in a microwave? 3 1/2

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what is more funny than watching a baby fly in a circle at 100 mph stopping it with a shovel

thumb_up thumb_down -13

PerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerú

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why shouldnt you take the virginity of a 14 year old? Their pre-frontal lobe is not developed enough to sufficiently judge the affect of this action on their life.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did a man throw butter out the window ? So he could see butter fly and then realized that there was one on window cil

thumb_up thumb_down -13

you put the chevy to the levy when your pants fell heave diarea

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a PS3? Michael was a succesful dancer, singer-songwriter, musician, and philanthropist, whereas a PS3 is a games console.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q)A man and a women are hiking on a mountain trail. A bear appears. What do they do? A) Die.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What was the color of the big lipped, struggling rap artist who violently raped and killed a young woman after robbing a convenience store at gunpoint? Red. He was covered in blood.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock Knock! Who's there? Sex! Sex Who? Sex with me. BOOM!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops