Why did the man take a shower?, he didint smell so good...

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man was driving in his BMW one day when a mini passed him out on the fast lane. The BMW driver thought 'i can't have that!' so he sped up and overtook the mini. Unfortunately he wasn't paying attention and he drove into the back of a school bus. Ironically the bus contained the mini driver's 3 daughters, he was driving so fast because they had forgotten to bring their lunch and he was trying to catch up with the bus so he could give them their sandwiches. There were no survivors of the crash, except for the mini driver.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do and Asian and an orange have in common? They are both complex, carbon based life forms living on the only world in the universe known to harbor life.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock Knock. Who's there? Interrupting Pessimist. Interrupting Pessi- Slavery.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why does little Lucy have no friends? because she is in a wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A white person went to see Think like a Lady by Steve Harvey.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Yo mama is so fat, Dora couldn't explore her. Yo mama is so dumb she brought a spoon to the Super bowl. Yo mama so hairy, Bigfoot took her picture and screamed he was gonna be a millionare.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what did the indian boy say to his friend? I wish you were real

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats worse than ten dead babies in one tree? I dont know, but that is quite a graphic sight i have in my mind right now.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Remember when the new jokes on this sight actually used to be funny?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Question :how many does an episode of Power Rangers show the power rangers face answer I'm not that big with power rangers.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Want to hear a joke? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck would chuck wood? The etymology of the name woodchuck is unrelated to wood or chucking. It stems from an Algonquian (possibly Narragansett) name for the animal, wuchak. The similarity between the words has led to the common tongue-twister that you have just stated.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse than a papercut? Dying

thumb_up thumb_down -3

- Mommy look, I built a sandcastle! - Who cares, you have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why did the baby fall out of the crib? it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Chemotherapy.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A mercenary was sent from the US to kill a terrorist leader. He was captured by the terrorists but wouldn't give away any information. They beat him, shocked him, cut him, and punched him in a dark room with a light beaming right down on him like a spotlight. It was a grueling five long days until they said "We know you have the information we want, tell us or you will die!" The mercenary sat in silence. They took out a gun and pointed it to his head. The mercenary then broke down and told the terrorists the information they wanted to hear. The terrorists then shot him to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Roses are red Violets are blue I am schizophrenic ...and so am I

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a Black Priest? His title would probably be Reverend, and then his last name after it.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Feeling alone fast after opening your mouth? Feel that people ignore your conversations? BUY A PARROT! Teach it to say AHAH!... And Uhuh, and I PERFECTLY UNDERSTAND! Now YOU CAN BE APPRECIATED INSTANTLY BY A BIRD THAT DOES NOT KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU ARE SAYING!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A duck walks into a bar and says, "Have you got any grapes?" The bartender replies "No." The duck then leaves but returns the next day and again asks, "Have you got any grapes?" And again the bartender answers, "No." This happens again the next day and in annoyance the bartender yells, "If you come in tomorrow and ask if I have any grapes, then I will nail your feet to the floor!" The next day the duck came into the bar and asked, "Have you got any nails?" to which the bartender replied, "Yes." The duck then walked out of the bar

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what did the blind orphan with no legs get for christmas? cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops