Q: What is better than sex? A: A relationship where you can be completely intimate with your partner

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Your momma is so fat she has an increased risk or cardiac arrest due to obesity. I ridicule her based on the theory that her morbid obesity is due to the fact that she has a diet consisting of large amounts of calories and high fat content and/or she is known to be very sedentary and does not partake in physical exercise. However, if this increase in body fat content is due to genetics I retract my previous statement and wish only the best for her, also, you might want to lower your calorie intake and visit your local gym, lest you succumb to morbid obesity, much like your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: What do is it called when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? A: Why give it a name when it is never goin to happen!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

whats the best thing about polio...death

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How many babies does it take it to feed a grown man? It depends on the size of the man, how hungry he is and how big the babies are.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than getting tripped? Getting shot.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the French-Italian couple name their child? Angelo Pierre Smith, giving tribute to the father's uncle Angelo, and the mother's great-grandfather, Pierre.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: What did the mute kid say to his mother ?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was a woman crying in a corner of a room She was raped

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the little boy crying? Because he had an undescended testicle

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Where's the best place to gather black people to roleplay as prison victims for a documentary? Prison or the Graveyard.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q: Why was the man eating his foot? A: Because he was a part of the circus.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

As a stand-up comedian, I've been really interested in how comedians have recovered from jokes not hitting making fun of the fact. Recently, I was in a situation where a rhetorical question didn't hit, and anti-joking (lamenting on the lack of a punchline sarcastically) ended up generating the laugh I needed to move on! Hurray for Anti-jokes! Me: You know the gym Extreme Fitness? Audience: SILENCE Me: (sarcastically) Yes, exactly. That's exactly how that interaction went in my mind when I was practising at home. I ask question - audience responds euphorically - I continue with my joke... http://michaeljagdeo.wordpress.com/2012/01/29/anti-jokes-how-to-recover-when-a-joke-doesnt-hit/

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What does a nun and a hat have in common? Size

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's fat and ugly? Your face ... But only if its fat and ugly

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the black man eat at a picnic? I don't know, I wasn't there.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Jane's parachute not open? Because a plane hit her on the way down.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the truck driver get when he ran over my cat? A pave low.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

An Asian man fails a math test

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Waiter, waiter, there's a fly in my soup! That's not a fly, it's a gnat.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Q:what do you call a black man with blonde hair flying a plane? A: A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than Christmas alone? Pedophiles.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats worse than the Holocaust. A worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops