What do you call a city that never sleeps? Cities cannot sleep; they merely represent a societal body of people living in a confined community. A city may have a prosperous night-life, however, cannot functionally "fall asleep" in the convential sense of the term.

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What did the jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? 124

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Why cant Helen Keller drive? ......because women cant drive(:

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Your mom is so fat that when she wears a yellow raincoat outside, people notice a rather large woman who is enjoying the weather and wearing a yellow raincoat.

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I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. Open up. We have a warrant for your arrest.

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Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

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what did the pizza say to the bread? nothing pizza cant talk

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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Why are all women bad drivers? All of them aren't.

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You know what's sad and Funny? When a guy walks into a gay bar and doesn't get hit on.

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the waterhorse is a beautiful creature. It often frolics through fields of wheat.

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What's the best part about having sex with a 9 year old in the shower? Pedophilia is a crime, and the people that do it are very sick individuals. The fact that you even thought there was a 'best' part disgusts me.

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dylan wishes life was like cod. that way he would actually be able to do something cool

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Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

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Why do people who walk into bars never have names?

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What's black and white and red all over? The Nazi Flag in WW II

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Q. Why did the triceratops die? A. A giant meteor hit him.

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari. A Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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Why do women live longer? Because they work weaker.

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yo mama so fat she died from a heart attack

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What did the blind kid say to his dad Nothing , his dads dead

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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