What did the suicide bomber say to the other suicide bomber? You're da bomb!

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what did the women with no arms and legs say to her daughter? go to your room.

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Two guys are on a bridge. One commits suicide, the other one is called John.

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Why did the boy take the girls backpack? he has this many hands

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Asians

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if you consider his name parents name social security number hospital born date born and nurses signature all on a peice of paper then i guess you consider that his birth certificate

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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An ant walks into a bar. Nobody Notices...

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Why do dead babies go to funerals? They don't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was heading to the funeral house to mourn his dead family.

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My Penis is so big. How big is it? If you lay my penis down beside another similarly lengthy object, approximately 10" long, it would most likely surpass the length of the object you chose to measure it to.

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Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

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Why did the black man quit his job as a rapper? Because he was an admirable father and husband and was willing to sacrifice his passion to provide for those he loved.

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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What rhymes with shuck and starts with an f flamethrower

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A man walks into a bar gets hurt and falls over

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How many jews can you fit in a car? It depends on how many seats there are, but some could double-buckle and stuff like that to fit more if necessary.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a carpet? I don't sell carpets.

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Knock knock Who's this? Your neighbor Yes can I help you? Hi, I'm new around here, can you help me find the closest gas station? Turn right over there pass 2 traffic lights it will be on your left Okay, thank you You're welcome

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An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

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How did Darth Vader make the little black boy's day? "I am your father"*heavy breath, heavy breath*

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race-car = rac-ecar

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A black man walks into a bar He looks at the menu and realizes he's in a bar, so he leaves

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT IS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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