A doctor rides in his Mercedes Benz through a rough, poor part of town. He sees a homeless person who is begging for money. The doctor stops and gets out of his car and asks "Ill give you some money if you need it for food". The homeless person then shoots and kills the doctor, takes his wallet, and buys crack.

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A man walks into an insane asylum and says hello-The inmates assault him with mindless babble. A man walks into an insane asylum and says argblthenthrozaphowea-The inmates say hello.

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There was a blond girl and a brunette girl. The brunette had a pink shirt that had " Abercrombie & Fitch" on it. The blond looks at the brunette and asks, where did you get your shirt?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well I'll tell you. He was happily gliding down the sidewalk when he realized that his destination was across the road. He then proceeds to take In his surroundings . He finds that there is no indication telling him to stop so he then cautiously walks across the road watching for any dangerous movement. He safely makes it across and proceeds to his destination which is the slaughtering house. He is a retarded chicken

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Q: How do you keep a carnival fish for more than a week? A: Place it in formaldehyde when you get home

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Why did the boy cry when he sat on Santa's lap? Because Santa's boner reminded him of his pedophiliac step-father.

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Top ten reasons Microsoft Doors is better than Microsoft Windows. 1. Easier to open. 2. Doors do not crash... Windows does! 3. Watching pron? Your mother around? JUST SLAM THAT SHlT ON HER FACE! 4. Saves power! (Its easier to just shut and open doors) 5. Doors are a lot easier to get trough than windows. 6. When windows wishes you welcome the first time you install it, you still cant wipe your damn feet on it! 7. Its easier to surf on the internet on top of doors than on windows. 8. While Windows is easy to hack because you can try codes forever, you can just buy a good lock on your door and shut it. 9.The sun glaring on your screen trough your windows? GET MICROSOFT DOORS! 10. I dare you make one, i live doing this shit. Capcom before. And special thanks to you! Thanks for playing! Capcom now: Fuck off thats not DLC paywall! its actual downloadable only content! Just pay 45 bucks to get all colors to all characters.... ...Downloading Allcolors 10kb

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what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

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I may have alzheimers...Thank god I dont have alzheimers

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Why was baby Johnny crying because a monkey came and ripped of his dick

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Q: What do you call someone who cant swim? A: A person that cant swim.

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I went to the opticians to get my eyes checked. The optician said "you need glasses".

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family.

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If Chuck Norris has $5, and you have $5, Chuck Norris still has more money than you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay boys house. Knock knock! whose there? The chicken!!

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What's purple and smells like crap? Crap. I lied about the purple

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So A duck wants to be a musician. Day1: He cuts of his beak attempting to sing. Day2: Dead

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A lepord can carry two times its weight into a tree, i dont have a joke for this yet but youll leave here learning something.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a mini? It is variable according to the size of each baby.

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Why does Jordan Abu aita have a small pepe? Because he is black

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Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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