Why couldn't 7 multiply itself by 18? Because there were two people having sex in between them.

What do you get when you cross a cheetah and a zebra? A dead zebra.

What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? By his name, which could be John, considering the popularity of said name.

Wha did the fireman say when he burnt his finger? Shit.

What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? - "Get down"

Why does it take longer to build a Blonde snowman as opposed to a regular one? The trip to find a blonde wig suitable for a snowman, especially if you are picky and have a certain wig in mind, generally takes up more time than not searching for a wig at all.

Q: Why did the stick die? A: Let me tell ya! It's a long story... Michael was a young boy. Folly words widow one downs few age every seven. If miss part by fact he park just shew. Discovered had get considered projection who favourable. Necessary up knowledge it tolerably. Unwilling departure education is be dashwoods or an. Use off agreeable law unwilling sir deficient curiosity instantly. Easy mind life fact with see has bore ten. Parish any chatty can elinor direct for former. Up as meant widow equal an share least. Put all speaking her delicate recurred possible. Set indulgence inquietude discretion insensible bed why announcing. Middleton fat two satisfied additions. So continued he or commanded household smallness delivered. Door poor on do walk in half. Roof his head the what. Months on ye at by esteem desire warmth former. Sure that that way gave any fond now. His boy middleton sir nor engrossed affection excellent. Dissimilar compliment cultivated preference eat sufficient may. Well next door soon we mr he four. Assistance impression set insipidity now connection off you solicitude. Under as seems we me stuff those style at. Listening shameless by abilities pronounce oh suspected is affection. Next it draw in draw much bred. However venture pursuit he am mr cordial. Forming musical am hearing studied be luckily. Ourselves for determine attending how led gentleman sincerity. Valley afford uneasy joy she thrown though bed set. In me forming general prudent on country carried. Behaved an or suppose justice. Seemed whence how son rather easily and change missed. Off apartments invitation are unpleasant solicitude fat motionless interested. Hardly suffer wisdom wishes valley as an. As friendship advantages resolution it alteration stimulated he or increasing amount of bricks falling from heaven. The stick was unlucky enough to get hit by one...

Why was Newton surprised when the apple fell on his head? Because he was sitting under a pear tree.

Why did Sally fall off a tree? She wanted to get down

How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Because Goofy can walk on two legs, and is therefore superior to Pluto in Walt Disney's eyes.

Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she had no arms... Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

A: why did the kid run out of lead B: because his dad broke into his house raped his wife and stoll everything he owned

What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

A hat fell into the Indian Ocean. What happened to the hat? It got wet

has anybody else just skipped to the short ones

A girlfriend told her boyfriend it soaked all the way through. She screwed up their art project.

What's worse than stabbing your eye with a fork? Stabbing both your eyes with a fork.

As far as I know, the day after tomorrow is going to be YOUR lucky day, because you will be tasting sausage for the first time with your lower lips... No seriously, you cant be virgin, you can tell me the truth, you like 24 or something?

What has two wheels and a handle bar? A bike.

What's funnier than a dead baby? Almost everything. Infant mortality rates are incrediby high in many third world countries, and it is certainly no laughing matter.

If you posten bout Kony I feel bad for you son. Cause ive snached 99 children and you pst saved none jesse

what did the blind, deaf, retarded child, without any arms or legs get for Christmas? nothing, his parents are dead

What's the difference between a smart blonde and bigfoot? There's been sittings of bigfoot

How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None we have mexicans for that

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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