Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber where walking in New York . They both get ice cream... then bieber gets hit by a bus.

What's read, round and gets smaller? A baby combing its hair with a potato pearler

Why did the elephant cross the road? To get to the other side.

Why are butt pirates butt pirates? Because they just ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR FRUITS

Knock knock Who's this? Your neighbor Yes can I help you? Hi, I'm new around here, can you help me find the closest gas station? Turn right over there pass 2 traffic lights it will be on your left Okay, thank you You're welcome

Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

What's the difference between a Jew and a canoe? One is a type of small aquatic craft, and the other is a human being who practices Judaism.

How is pinocchio's nose like a penis? They're nothing alike.

When Chuck Norris realized that there was a more superior being than himself. What did he say? Suck it Safka

Why are Americans so fat? Poor diet and lack of exercise.

What happened when the zombie walked into the blonde lady convention? He went home hungry.

Knock knock who's thare Your mom She's dead you bitch

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A duplicate joke on anti-joke.com in an attempt to get thumbs up. Sad, sad people...

A man walks in front of a bus. The bus driver avoids the man but hits the boy eating ice cream.

How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

I may have Alzheimer's. But at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

What's the difference between a blonde and a carrot? One's a human, the other's a vegetable.

Say the line below sixteen times very fast: I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... Done? Good boy!

What did Mitch say to joe when he saw his fly was down? Nothing because he's a bagle

If the best things in life are free, whats the hardest things in life? Death.

Why did the man cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken

An Italian, a Mexican, and an American are sharing a meal on the Titanic. They all died for the women and children first.

What do a black man and a cop have in common? They are both not cabbages.

Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven was a creepy movie, and it gave Six nightmares.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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