Why did the downtown New York worker never make it home? An airplane crashed into his office.

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When life gives you lemons, sell them. Rejoice in your free money.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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I met a fat girl and fucked her on an elevator. . . It was wrong on so many levels.

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Roses are red Violets are blue life is a bitch and so are you

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Your mother is so stupid that she claimed the pole ran into her.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Yes, it's actually very nice.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being taken to the slaughter house

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Q: yugdyijgdripgdghd A: sorry I'm retarted. I don't know wtf I'm doin

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ive got nothing funny to say, so this is what its like to be a woman

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What did the lawyer name his daughter? Amanda.

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Why is Evan short? He was born that way.

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You are like really sincere aren't you? I really appreciate that in a friend. Thank you for being who you are Nero.

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What's funny about black people? The fact that they are all in prison for not being visible at night time.

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Why couldn't the Asian couple have a white baby? Because two Wongs were mixed up in the paperwork so as a result the other Wong family ended up getting the child.

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Why did the boy cry Because he fell

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

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I pushed my friend off the bed after losing to him in FIFA 2011. He died.

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Get the FREE anti jokes app with loads and loads of anti jokes anywhere you go, even offline! All the funniest and most popular, and loads more new ones. Why not? After all, it's free! http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/hilarious-anti-jokes-lite/id438092279?mt=8&ls=1

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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how many pancakes does it take to get fat if u answered this question your already fat

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Why couldn't the tractor start? The farmer lost the keys.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . His family was experiencing financial troubles, and needed money. He tried applying for many jobs, but they just didn't quite work out. After ending up in the drug business to support his family, a deal went bad and he was shot, landing him in the hospital. The night his family arrived to check on him, the same shooter made his way to his room, and murdered his wife and 3 children, and somehow managed to evade police. Months after this incident, Ralph, the same chicken who was in the hospital and witnessed his family's murder, was finally released. He had nothing to live for, nothing to look forward to in the future. He took up alcohol abuse for some time, until realizing what truly had to be done. He began tracking down his family's killer, and with each day spent, he became closer and closer to discovering the dealer's whereabouts. One day, he finally figured out who it was. As he arrived at the killers' home, he took one last deep breath, then stormed in. After fighting through many of the dealers' body-guards, Ralph finally reached the notorious drug dealing murder, Foghorn Leghorn. As a bloody battle ensued, it was clear who the winner would be.. As Ralph staggered out of the destroyed home, bloodied, yet victorious, he realized something. All the tracking, all the killing, all the bloodshed he had created, was all in vain. He realized that taking Foghorn's life didn't, and wouldn't, bring his family back. Finding himself dumbfounded, he began to trot, head down, through the field where the bad drug deal happened, almost a year ago now. He took one last deep breath, looked at the stars, and took his first step on the road. This was it he decided, he was finally going to reunite with his family again once more. As the headlights raced towards him, he heard his family in unison whisper to him "You're finally home Ralph, you're finally home."

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Yo mamas so greasy that she has a beard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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