Whats worse than getting a paper-cut? Getting shot. In the head. Three times.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A murderer walks into a bar with a knife. He then stabs seven people and is then arrested shortly after.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's worse than a duck with one leg? A nuclear explosion

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? As they can't find any, they are just squirrels, they can not asist little timmy choking on the lightbulb rolling around on the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

When life throws you lemons, your first instinct is to make lemonade. Due to your severe lemon allergy, however, you will die within several minutes and therefore have no viable method of creating said lemonade. You die horribly and your death sparks a movement against the biological warfare of life.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the girl get with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

My period is red, Your sauce is white, now pull down your pants and let me do my workout.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Your momma's so fat that she should really be concerned for her health and seek professional help to manage her weight.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

the man was talking to a phone no answered cause he talking to a brick wall

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why Is Six Afraid of Seven? because he is black.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your son has been in a car accident and has died.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

why is pie good. because it just is.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Hi rebecca , its me that guy over there. purple moneky blue dishwasher. aka JUMANJIIII

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what did the chicken say to the other chicken? nothing, they dont talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why couldn't the duck fly? It died.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you dance to the black eyed peas? You don't you listen

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: Guess what my Mom and Dad did last Night on the Kitchen Table.... A: Had Dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

like if u think princess kenny id the fairest maiden in all the land. if u havent played or watched pewdiepie play south park the stick of truth, disregard this message.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

i'll leave 'em dead in the living room. get it leave 'em dead in the living room

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what did the boy get after his first communion? unwanted intercourse with his priest that resulted in scaring him for life, until the day he killed himself because he could never get over it.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why don't women wear watches? In the technological age we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock Knock Who’s there? Wolf Wolf who? Wolf who!? Is that really the first question that comes to mind when confronted with a talking wolf?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

I was strolling along the countryside and saw 2 niiggers peacefully hanging from a tree

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops