Q:What did sandy say to spongebob A:Nothing they were both crushed by the water pressure of being at the bottom of the ocean ni,gger

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do you wanna hear a joke school

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Why did Sally failed gym class Because she couldn't do push ups

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What did the caveman say to the dinosaurs, nothing dinosaurs are from the Triassic period 25 million years ago, while the origin of man came around 230000 years ago, so there would be a massive time difference and and would never seen each other.

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An over weight naked black guy walks into a bank and says "give me all your money!"

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why did the cow say "moo"? because he's a cow and that's what cows say.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? it had vaginal warts

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Knock Knock. Who's there? ........ It turns out it was Helen Keller.

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Q:What's the difference between a Boy scout and a Jew? A:Boy scouts come back from camp.

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Whats the difference between a Corvette and a dead bag of babies. -there's not a Corvette in my garage

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What did the man say after being hit by a bus? Nothing he is now dead.

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Women are like fish. It's hard to tell when they are crying underwater.

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why did the kid die? his mom shot him

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How many pieces of gum are in 5 gum? 5. i meen 7

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Q - What do you call a hamburger without pickles? A - You call it a hamburger just without the pickles.

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What's more funny than an anti-joke? A joke.

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Excuse me, I have a shitload of stuff to do, so you are Eliza huh? I thought that was just one person conveying something to someone. Anyway, what is your name? My name is actually Nero, but you do not strike me as an Eliza, first name is more than enough. You know, if you dare, Ill be back shortly, I was gonna shower but then again, I haven't moved at all today, so yeah. Saved you? I have never saved anyone well, excuse me then, see you around, worry less about people bothering with us chatting, hell they might risk learning something (not a chance, people here are fucking jackasses, with one exception, and I do not mean me this time).

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why did the monkey buy a shoe? to put em on!!!!

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Women can vote? WTF

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Can you spell iCup? I see you pee?

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What did Canada say to America? We will not become apart of the United States where people are known as Fat Nascar lovin hicks!

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Why did Greg move to the Lake District? Because his dog died and the family is in mourning.

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what does a black person and an elephant have in common? what? they are both living beings who have their place in the world.

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A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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