roses are red violets are blue i need a pee and so do u

Whats Brown And Sticky?! My Shit!

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow who? The one from the farm across the street. Can Randy come play outside?

What do you get hanging from an apple tree? Sore Arms.

What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

Why shouldn't you drink and drive? Because you might hit a bump and spill your drink.

Why was the girl called stupid? She is mentally retarded...

What did Abraham lincoln do after getting assassinated? Certainly not riding a bike thats for sure.

Why did the Asian guy's condom slip? Because the condom was put on the opposite way.

Punching a baby

What happens when you shoot Chuck Norris? You go to jail.

what kind of mexicans are NOT in the U.S. -legal

How do you kill off a zombie apocalypse? Laser vision

Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

If life gives you lemons.... Life is an abstract noun not a physical object so it can not give you lemons.

Why did the girl eat a cookie? Because cookies are good.

what is worst than 1 bee stings two bee stings what is worst than two bee stings holocaust what is worse than three bee stings getting raped by a giant scorpion

A Jewish man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

Why can't Susie jump rope? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! who's there? Not Susie.

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocaust.

how do you know when an elephant been in your refridgrator The door wont close

Whats the difference between a loser and a winner there places

What kind of words did the terrorist say on his date? His last ones.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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