Why did humpty dumpty have a great fall? He was committing suicide.

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Q: What do the Gynecologist and the pizza delivery man have in common? A: They both get to smell the goods but neither one of them can eat it

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A Jew, Catholic, and a Mexican walk into a bar. The Jew leaves first for an unrelated reason.

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politically correct!

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What do you call a man named Cornelius? Well, he prefers to go by his middle name, Eric, because he was teased as a child for being named Cornelius.

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What has eight legs and one eye? Two chairs and half a pigs face.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a mountainous mound of slain human offspring? There is none, the second is conferred to the subject of a conversation using a highly advanced vernacular.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a giraffe? A really f*cked up hybrid.

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Women

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Ask me if I'm Abraham Lincoln. Are you Abraham Lincoln? No.

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What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

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How do you tell if an alien had been in your house? All your lightbulbs are gone and your fridge is pregnant.

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What did the captcha tell me to write? Tepsyto Dora

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if you spell clever backwards you get a mixture of letters that don't make sense

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what do you say to the preacher when he walks into church? i dont fu***** know, im jewish.

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What is black and white and red all over? A black, red and white picture

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whats black and white? Micheal Jackson. - Avery Vartanian

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Isn't everyday "black tie optional"?

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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roses are grey violets are grey so says my color blind cousin

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What did the pear say to the orange? Orange ya gonna say hi? What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk.

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Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? He was busy

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whats black and yellow a chinese with a bruise

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What did the horse say to the other horse? We are both horses

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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